萬聖節快樂!!
其實這節日對我來說並不特別, 也沒什麼意思. 我相信對許多其他人來說也一樣. 但今天我卻有另一番體會...
今天一位同學仔手捧著一籃朱古力糖蹦蹦跳地走進我office, 開開心心地祝我萬聖節快樂和請我吃糖. 其實只是在任何一間超市都可買到的朱古力, 而那個籃子其實只是房內一直放鎖匙的小籃子, 但同學仔用coffee shop的紙巾鋪底, 放上糖果,再加上興奮和真摯的笑容端在我的眼前, 我便立刻被她的快樂感染, 也覺得好開心. 當她離開繼續去派糖時, 我便對她說:你真有生活情趣!
我也不知道為何突然這樣說. 之後我再想想, 曾幾何時(中學的年代),過時過節我也會弄些小禮物來送給朋友. 禮物送出, 朋友開心, 自己也因而開心, 這就是彼此分享的快樂.有些人會說無聊人才有這種閒情逸緻... 但我卻覺得, 懂得為日常生活添樂趣才是聰明人!
其實各大小節日的慶祝,都是給我們找個藉口開心一下, 也跟身邊的人分享這快樂! 又或者, 其實無論那一天, 我們都可以這樣做. 可能, 這就是生活的情趣了!
Hey, my friends, Happy Halloween!!!
自從北角站通車後, 我教琴的工作實在方便了許多.
不過儘管如此,從第一次在地鐵站見到的這句標語開始, 我就總是覺得怪怪的.
今天教完琴後, 當我倦倦的倚在車門旁時, 又看見這句說話. 不知怎的, 有一種很反感的情緒出現... 好想反問說話背後的意思是真的嗎? 多點時間真的等如多點生活? 就算真的多了, 又會是多了一點怎麼樣的生活? 覺得好可怕,無時無刻都被灌輸著"分秒必爭"的意識形態... 甚至把之高舉成金科玉律... 然後, 生活成為時間的附屬品, 必須依附在時間之上...
生活不再主導時間, 而反被時間牽著走... 怎說也叫心悸動....
Today is holiday. I stay all day long in the hall...
Plan to watch a movie at first, but since my friend is not available today, the plan is in vain...
Anyway, I KNOW that it is a holiday, and holiday IS for relax. Having experienced the recent burnouts, I'm now trying my very best to lead a healthy lifestyle, which includes not only regular exercises, but also a "cognitive restructuring" -- I must stop pushing myself too hard! But everything needs a balance, which is the most challenging task forever! How to get things done without exhausting oneself? How to feel easy without slackening too much?
......
I did some revision on RM this morning... thx God, finally feel less puzzled!! In the afternoon, I tried to read up the 3-inch-thick PhD thesis as part of my literature review... not quite successful, as I fell asleep on and off... and eventually I just decided to take a nap first! =P Ithought I have not slept for so much in one day for ages!
When I look into the mirror recently, I'm scared by the black circles around the red and swollen eyes... Hope that today's rest will refresh me!
But I know that, what refresh my heart and spirit is only You. Thank you my Lord!
through the window of my room, i can see the sea over there... i particularly like looking out in the morning, while the golden rays reflected upon the waves... what a beautiful scene!
this is absolutely one of the pros of coming to CU... near to my hall is the sport ground, i'm now developing the habit of jogging there in the morning.... so far the feeling is just great... at the break of the day, the clouds are still quite thick, protecting me from the harsh sunshine; and as i jog, i look up to the sky, i try to listen to the surroundings, and i whisper a worship prayer... what's more, it's important time for me, i know, and i expect, that i'm going to listen to my heart too, despite the fact that i'm what a sport-idiot and indeed feeling hard for the exercises! ... but good for me, to train up my determination, and perseverance, and patience, and haha, fitness!!
somehow i just feel that, i may understand more what meant by "power from above"...
the road is long, indeed....
今天開了第一次psy cell,有10位同學出席.實在好高興在新的學習環境內原來有許多弟兄姊妹. 雖然我們沒有很清晰的所謂"異象",但今天我已經想像到一幅圖畫---就是在勞碌的postgrad life中, 可以跟弟兄姊妹唱首詩歌, 一起靜靜, 感受神的恩典, 又或者彼此分享代禱-- 實在太太太舒服了!!
好希望這個cell可以繼續run下去, 成為大家互相的支持和鼓勵, 也成為身邊人的見証!! 願神賜福予我們!!
今天導師見到我, 第一個反應竟然是話我個樣好"謝".
第二句就說:"原來在少年部事奉的樣子會是這樣的麼?"
當然, 她並沒有惡意; 只是我聽進耳中, 感到有點羞愧...
好像, 失了見証...
事奉很喜樂, 這是我很實在的感受;
然而事奉, 並且事奉以外的生活, 卻真的很累人...
我已經努力學習, 先睡覺再工作...
但真正力量的源頭,是主; 我知道的.
在團契中,唱"求聖靈吹我".
我把雙手垂下,靜靜地聽著,唱著,
用力地呼,用力地吸;
但願親愛的聖靈, 此刻就充滿我....
清潔的靈 求你吹我
聖靈氣息 求充滿我
驅我一切罪過 將愛心充滿我
真神的靈 求你吹我
生命的靈 求你吹我
聖靈氣息 求充滿我
將我驕傲除盡 吹進謙和柔順
真神的靈 求你吹我
更新的靈 求你吹我
聖靈氣息 求充滿我
深盼真純像主 真實經歷耶穌
真神的靈 求你吹我
大能的靈 求你吹我
聖靈氣息 求充滿我
深盼生活為主 得你加力扶助
真神的靈 求你吹我深盼生活為主 得你加力扶助
真神的靈 求你吹我
今日supervisor破天荒地約了我而沒遲到;
破天荒地一個mphil混在一大班cp trainees中間出visit;
破天荒地tutorial沒有超時;
最"駭人"的,還是
破天荒地遲交功課;
破天荒地在天黑之前返Hall!!!
自從上個星期近乎burnout的情況之後, 整個人都很疲倦, 什麼都不想理. 昨晚回到家,經爸爸和哥哥的調停下,媽媽初步叫做啋返我了,雖然態度上仍然叫人很難受. 不過我也已經覺得很安慰,可以稍稍放下一件心頭大石... 這種輕省的感覺真好,使我今早也放肆地睡到十點幾才起床... 睡覺真的很舒服...尤其在屋企裏自己的床舖上!! ^^
這兩星期對我來說實在很漫長... 雖說人總有軟弱的時候, 但偏偏我討厭向軟弱發出軟弱的同情... 有時我都不能明白自己, 好像是很感性的人, 卻又常常抑壓自己的感受... 唉,仲學人講修心理學... 根本連自己的情感,人際都處理不當, 還可以去幫助其他人嗎?...
好像說得太遠了, 事實上這刻的我,並不灰心,反倒是挺感恩的. 想起一節經文:
"我們在一切患難中祂就安慰我們,叫我們能用神所賜的安慰去安慰那遭各樣患難的人."當然我面對的談不上什麼患難, 但主的安慰與恩情是實在而深刻的. 我相信神的心意對我總是好的. 又想起:
"祂試煉我以後,我必如精金" 沒有可比經歷神, 也無可比天父教導我們成長!
Little by little in everyday, little by little in every way, Jesus is changing me.
Since I made taht turn about face, I've been grwoing in His grace, Jesus is changing me. He's changing me, my blessed Savior, I'm not the same person that I used to be; Sometimes it's slow growing, but ther's a knowing - some day perfect I will be!" 在秋令營中,弟兄姊妹們給了我許多的關心和支持, 為我代禱,也跟我不停地唱這首歌, 提醒我仰望那愛我至死的主耶穌...
應當一無掛慮,只要凡事藉著禱告祈求和感謝,將你們所要的告訴神.
神所賜出人意外的平安,必在耶穌裏保守你們的心懷意念."唱著這首歌,我又不期然地哼起黃國倫的另一首歌:
"你的恩典夠我用的,因為主的能力是在人的軟弱上顯得完全.
所以我更喜歡誇我的軟弱,好叫基督的能力覆庇我.
何時我軟弱,何時我就得剛強,因主的恩手永不離開我..."感謝天父,給我這段經歷... 仍未完結的,要走的路還長... 但我主與我同行,我要高舉你聖名! In Your name, Amen!
